It's Mandatory.

Alright, so maybe that candy thermometer is not so much of a suggestion, but a necessity… It’s just that, well, I am a cook not a baker.  So I look at recipes more as‘suggestions’ than mandatory rules.  I don’t believe in mandatory anywhere.  Not in my kitchen, not in my house, and not in my life.  There is no mandatory, because how in the hell is there room to create something spectacular if you have to follow the rules all the time? 

So, when it came time to make doughnut holes, I was all “Let’s be adventurous”  “Let’s get wild!” Let’s say SCREW the candy thermometer because “pshhh hot oil is hot oil” whatevs!

Yea… Get a candy thermometer.

Follow the damn directions.

I mean, it’s not like I got this recipe from some joe shmo off the streets, this is MARTHA here! Why didn’t I just listen to her?  Why did I have to be all “I am a Leo, I don’t follow rules! I make the rules!” 

Swift kick in my cocky kitchen. To my gut. Because damnit, I wanted a doughnut hole.  And these, well. I sort of ruined them all. 

So here’s my suggestion.  There is nothing wrong with this recipe, but for eff’s sake will you just follow it? Don’t be all “ I’m Don Draper, I make miracles in this shit”   Just follow it.

  

Caramel filled Doughnut Holes by Martha Stewart

2 1/2 cups all-purpose flour (spooned and leveled), plus more for work surface

1 cup cocoa powder

2 teaspoons baking powder

1/2 teaspoon baking soda

1 1/2 teaspoons coarse salt

1 cup sugar, plus more for coating

3/4 cup low-fat buttermilk

4 tablespoons ( 1/2 stick) unsalted butter, melted

2 large eggs

28 to 30 store-bought soft caramel squares, unwrapped

5 to 6 cups vegetable oil, for frying

Sift together flour, cocoa powder, baking powder, baking soda, and salt into a large bowl.

In another bowl, whisk together sugar, buttermilk, butter, and eggs until thoroughly combined. Stir buttermilk mixture into flour mixture just until a smooth dough forms. 

 

On a lightly floured work surface, pat dough flat and lightly flour. Roll out dough to a 1/3-inch thickness. Cut into rounds with a 2 1/2-inch cookie cutter (to lift rounds from work surface, use a thin spatula). Reroll and cut scraps. 

Place a caramel in the center of each round, pinch dough closed around it, and gently roll into a smooth ball. 

Line a baking sheet with paper towels. Fill a wide shallow bowl with 1 inch sugar ( I STRONGLY SUGGEST YOU FORGET EVERYTHING I JUST TOLD YOU AND ADD CINNAMON TO THIS). In a large heavy pot, heat 4 inches oil until it registers 350 degrees on a candy thermometer. In batches of 4, fry doughnuts 5 minutes, turning once with a slotted spoon and adjusting heat as needed. 

Transfer doughnuts to prepared sheet; let rest 4 minutes. Roll in sugar to coat. Serve immediately.

So here is what happened.  I put the oil in my dutch and I turned the heat up. High.  I let it go until it rippled and sizzled when I dropped a piece of dough in there.  So I’m all “yeas this fat is ready to be fried”

Then it browned up. REAL QUICK. Like 30 seconds quick.  So they are supposed to cook for 4 minutes and I’m all, “Shiiit this is raw, I just know it.”  And it was. So I turned the heat down for the second batch. And I throw them in and it browns up, in about a minute. Damn! What if I finished these off in the oven.  YEAS great idea. I’ll go ahead and put these in the oven and they’ll finish in there. Yea. I mean it just doesn’t taste like a donut when you do that so much as like a fried rock. With a caramel square in the middle.

So, if you could just do yourself a solid, and buy a candy thermometer, that would be great.

Scratch that, it’s mandatory! You will use a candy thermometer or you are grounded for 1 week!

Love,

Whit